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"Paying Attention to Birds" Have birds changed or are we just noticing them? Because I’ve been fascinated with birds lately. Not in a “this is my new hobby” way. Just in the morning, with coffee, looking out the window, and somehow getting pulled into whatever is happening out there. There’s a feeder. It’s squirrel-proof, but there’s always a squirrel getting into it anyway. And then there are the robins, already out there doing whatever it is they do this time of year—which, apparently, is figuring out where to nest. Around here, that starts now, and by June there are hungry babies. None of that is new. So why does it feel like it is? ________________________________________ Maybe it’s just spring. This is when birds are the most active. That part is real. But the more you pay attention, the less random it sounds. What I used to think of as just background noise is actually more specific than that. Some of it is territorial—marking space. Some of it is about mating. And they don’t just have one sound—they change it depending on what they’re doing. When you sit and really listen, eyes closed, it’s obviously intelligent. Even the timing of it—early morning isn’t random. The air is quieter, the sound carries further. So what feels calm on our end is actually a lot happening on theirs. And then you realize you can actually figure some of it out. There are apps now that will listen and tell you what bird you’re hearing. You hold up your phone and suddenly it’s not just “a bird,” it’s a specific one, with its own patterns and habits. Which is a strange thing to find yourself doing. And once you know even a little of it, it’s hard to go back to not hearing it. ________________________________________ Or it’s something else entirely. There’s also the part people don’t always say out loud. That birds can start to feel… meaningful. Certain ones show up and it doesn’t quite feel random. A hawk circling overhead. A cardinal landing nearby. And then your brain goes a step further than it used to. You start to wonder if the hawk means something. If it’s someone. You think about your dog—gone a few years now—and then, there’s that cardinal again. Is that a coincidence? Only if you believe that it is. And maybe you do. Or maybe you don’t. And that’s new too. At the same time, there’s actual science behind the idea that they’re responding to things we don’t see. Magnetic fields. Air currents. Subtle shifts in the environment. They’re navigating with information we don’t consciously have. So they are, in a real sense, tuned into something else. Not in a way we need to define. Just… something we’re not part of in the same way. ________________________________________ Or maybe we’re just noticing. Maybe nothing changed. Maybe we’re just noticing. And there’s a part of that that’s easy to resist. Because paying attention to birds feels like something that belongs to a different category of person. People with time. People who aren’t in the middle of everything anymore. Not us. And yet. They are kind of incredible. And we’re standing there, watching them, having thoughts about them we probably wouldn’t have had before. So maybe the category was off. Maybe it was never about “old people liking birds.” Maybe it was about something else that comes with time. ________________________________________ Because this has all been happening the entire time. The same patterns. The same movement. The same songs, every spring. Generations of it, right outside, whether we were paying attention or not. The whole time. And our attention was somewhere else. On what was next. On what needed to get done. On everything that felt more immediate, more important. And now, for whatever reason, it isn’t. Or at least, not all of it is. Now there’s space to see this too. Not as a replacement for everything else. Just alongside it. The fact that there’s this constant layer of life happening—organized, active, repeating itself—right outside. And always has been. ________________________________________ So no, I don’t think birds have changed. But I do think it’s worth paying attention to the moment when you realize you have.

"Nothing About This Nest Is Empty" “Empty nester” is a phrase we use without thinking. Which is probably why no one stops to question what it actually implies. It’s a strange phrase when you really stop and look at it. Loaded with assumptions we rarely examine. The word “empty” doing most of the work—suggesting absence, loss, something finished. And more often than not, it lands squarely on her. Why her? Because the “nest,” whether we say it out loud or not, has always been hers. The one who kept it running, filled it, managed it, held it together. So when it’s “empty”…what exactly is that supposed to mean? That something is over? That something is missing? That she is? *** I’m speaking from experience. I’m the “her.” My nest has been empty for a few years now. I raised daughters, and like many families, we went through those in-between years—college, summers home, back and forth. A kind of emotional whiplash where they’re gone, then back, then gone again. And then one day, that chapter closes too. It’s bittersweet in a way that’s hard to fully explain—watching, knowing, feeling what it means to have launched two young women into their lives. Out of the proverbial nest. And like any transition, there’s a honeymoon phase. Instead of your days spent freezing on a soccer field, or your butt numb from sitting on bleachers, or mornings full of chaos, or those unexpected calls in the middle of the day—the broken bones, the colds, the heartbreaks, all of it… You now have, well…time. To do whatever. You. Please. Imagine that. It’s real. It’s energizing. And then, like anything, it settles. The novelty fades. Real life returns. And what you’re left with isn’t empty. It’s spacious. In a way that can feel wide. Open. And, at times, unfamiliar. And you might not know what to do with it. So I’m sharing this from that place—not as good or bad, just honest—some of what that spaciousness can hold. ________________________________________ There’s spaciousness in the relationships. What’s left is…well, you. And whoever you still live with. Probably the person you built this life with. And they’re navigating this “empty nest” too—in their own way. Their own shift in routine. Their own sense of freedom, or loss, or something in between. Things have changed. Even if you did all the “right” things along the way. Even if you had date nights. Even if you stayed connected. You can’t really prepare for this. Because for years—decades, really—your relationship existed inside something larger. A shared focus. A constant motion. A life being actively built and managed together. And now, that layer is gone. That phase of life is behind you, and the way you operate together changes. And what’s there now has more room. More visibility. Which can feel good. And unfamiliar. And, at times, a little exposing. Not because something is wrong. But because you’re both seeing things more clearly—without the buffer of everything that used to move between you. Don’t be surprised by that. But it doesn’t mean something is broken. It means something has shifted. And like anything that shifts, it asks something new of you. ________________________________________ There’s spaciousness in the house itself. Rooms that are still full—but no longer in use the same way. Closets, drawers, corners that hold more than just things. The high school sports gear. The art projects. The crafts. The stack of poster board you always kept on hand because someone, inevitably, needed something the night before. The swim goggles and cap from junior year. The ballet shoes still tucked into the pink bag you thought she might go back to. The jibbitz from the purple crocs she wore to Disneyland. All the Webkinz—some still with the tags on. And, of course, everything an American Girl could need, want, or imagine. You know they won’t need any of it anymore. But that doesn’t mean you can just throw it out. Because it’s not just stuff. It’s time. It’s memory. It’s entire seasons of your life—and theirs—sitting quietly on a shelf. Tangible, but holding something you can’t touch anymore. Versions of them—and of you—still there, but not accessible. Almost like little ghosts of a life that isn’t lived that way anymore. Not waiting, exactly. But not fully gone either. And you will be tempted to do one of two things. Or both. Clear it all out, or keep it all there. There’s no wrong answer. For me, there was something freeing about clearing space. And something unexpectedly hard about being the one who had to decide do it. ________________________________________ And then there’s the spaciousness that belongs to you. This one is big. If you’re like me, it might feel disorienting at first. Not bad. Not good. Just…different and unfamiliar. You’re still a mother. That doesn’t change. But you’re no longer needed in the same constant, immediate way. And that creates spaciousness—real spaciousness—for something else. And that “something” isn’t always clear. The questions start small. What do I want (like, for dinner)? And then, without warning, they get bigger. What do I actually want (like, for the rest of my life)? And you may not have an answer to either. That doesn’t mean something is wrong. It means something is opening. This is where you start to trust yourself. And actually listen. Because you’re not just adjusting to a quieter house, or a different rhythm, or even a different relationship. You’re face to face with a version of yourself that hasn’t had much room—until now. And just like any good relationship, there’s no shortcut for that. ________________________________________ So no, it’s not empty. And we should probably stop calling it that. Because this phase isn’t about what’s gone. It’s about what’s here now. Spacious. Open. Alive in a different way. And maybe that’s the point. Not to rush to fill it. Not to define it too quickly. But to let it be what it is— And see what has room to emerge.

"Your Stuff Is Not Just Stuff" There’s a moment—usually when you’re not even looking for it—when your things stop feeling neutral. You pick something up, or even just look at it, and instead of seeing what it is, you feel what it carries. The memory. The association. The version of you it’s tied to. Because your environment is never neutral. It’s in constant conversation with your nervous system. And that’s when you realize—this was never just about stuff. ________________________________________ A lot of us grew up in a different kind of world. Buying wasn’t frictionless. You went to the store. You thought about it. You saved for it. Marketing was something you passed on a billboard, not something that followed you, studied you, and learned you. Now we can have almost anything within hours. And the people selling it to us often understand our desires—and our insecurities—better than we do. So we buy. We build lives that look full. Closets, kitchens, drawers, shelves—all filled with things that were supposed to make life better, easier, more complete. And for a while, it works. Until it doesn’t. It becomes too much. Not only because of how much we have—but because of how often we’re being affected by it. Every object is asking for something, even if it’s just a reaction. Overwhelmed. Overstimulated. Out of control. Tired. Not enough. ________________________________________ There was a dress I used to love. Black and white houndstooth. Tailored perfectly. The kind of dress that made me feel capable, prepared, pulled together. I wore it to an important business meeting. And that day became one of the worst professional moments I’ve ever experienced. The dress didn’t change. But what it holds did. Now when I see it, I don’t think about how it fits. It reminds me of that day. That moment. That version of myself. And I have to ask—why would I keep something that takes me right back there? Maybe you have something like that too. ________________________________________ Some things I’ve let go of in ways that might sound extreme. I’ve burned clothes. Clothes I wore on the days I had to say goodbye to my dogs. Days that held a kind of love and weight that doesn’t need explaining—if you’ve been there, you know. Those clothes carried it. Not just sadness—but the magnitude of that moment. And I knew I couldn’t wear them again. They weren’t meant to be worn anymore. Not because I wanted to forget—but because that kind of moment doesn’t belong in an ordinary Tuesday. ________________________________________ And then there are the things that show up differently. Not tied to one moment—but there, every day. The KitchenAid mixer. The one that reminds you of the person you think you should be—the one who bakes from scratch, who shows up with something homemade instead of something in a box. The jeans that technically fit—but only if you’re standing. Close, but not quite there. Exercise equipment you don’t use. Unread books. Recipes saved for someday. Or the things you keep because you spent too much money on them—quiet reminders that you got it wrong. You wasted money. You believed something you shouldn’t have. None of it demands your attention. But it’s always there. And every time you see it, something in you responds—even if you don’t consciously notice it. A slight tightening. Something in you bracing, just a little. And over time, that adds up. ________________________________________ We’re often told to ask, “Does it bring you joy?” But that question doesn’t always go far enough. A better question is: What does this make me feel? Not in theory—but when you actually see it, touch it, live with it. Because your body answers that question before your mind does. Because sometimes the answer is simple. Not enough. Not yet. You should be more. You got this wrong. And once you start noticing that, it’s hard to unsee. ________________________________________ Living intentionally, in a world of stuff, isn’t about having less for the sake of it. It’s more than just finding your keys, or the best closet organization system, or the right baskets and containers. It’s about creating a space that supports you. A space that reflects who you are now. That means keeping what feels like alignment, and letting go of what feels like pressure. It means paying attention to what in your space feels grounding—and what feels like it’s keeping score. It also changes how you bring things in—not from restriction, but from honesty. Do I actually want this? Or do I want what I think this says about me? ________________________________________ Because the way you live starts to change when you make decisions this way. You bring in less of what you don’t need. You hold onto fewer things out of guilt, cost, or expectation. And what’s left starts to feel different. Not empty. Not minimal for the sake of it. Just… intentional. A space that supports you. A space where the things around you feel like you—how you live, what you enjoy, what you reach for without thinking. Things you actually like. That you chose. That feel good to see, to use, to live with. Things that carry something positive. Or nothing at all. ________________________________________ And that changes the experience of being in your space. You’re not managing it. You’re not reacting to it. You’re just… in it.

My Uncle Ray, my dad's brother, was a really nice guy. When I was collecting pictures for this story, I reached out to my cousins, Liz and Maryann to find a few to add to this post. During that exchange, Maryann shared that she used to set up her Barbie house and cottage on my uncle's billiards (pool) table, where he would have been playing the game of 8 ball. Maryann mentioned the table's green felt was the grass for her house. As you will read below, as important as billiards was to my uncle, family was more important. Below is the 4th story in my dad's series of posts. At some point, I will need to give them their own category on the website. If this is your first time reading my dad's stories, you can catch up on the first one, Family Storytelling Tradition With Papa Fiore . If you want to keep up with the stories as well as my Sensory Experience reviews, please subscribe here . ---------------------- Brother Ray My Uncle Ray, playing billiards at a local pool hall. There is an old saying that rings true now and forever. "You can pick your friends, but you can't pick your relatives". I was lucky to have a brother who had my back his entire life. Ray passed away a couple of years ago, but he remains alive in the hearts and minds of myself and his two daughters Liz and Maryann. Ray's last couple of years were tough and the devotion and dedication of Liz and Maryann gave him the strength to hold on as long as he could. The Rooted & Refined Living Expert Tip:   "Playing games and sports is a great way to bring family and friends together." I would like to pay homage to my brother in this the fourth installment of my writings. I am 4 1/2 years older than Ray. This is not an approximation but as real as it gets. My birthday is April 1 and Ray's birthday was September 30... 6 months to the day. Ray (left) and my dad, Tony as kids. When Ray was 14, he took an interest in pool. He watched it on television and marveled at the skill of the players. At 16 years old he started going to the pool hall at the corner of Richmond Avenue and Richmond Terrace. My parents weren't thrilled with the idea since the characters that hung around there had questionable backgrounds. Mom and Dad came up with an idea. Why not give Ray a pool table as a Christmas present. A nice idea but it wasn't cheap since a regulation pool table cost about $800... a lot of money back then. It seemed important enough to make such a sacrifice, and they wound up buying an old fashion pool table with tunnels, not a net. The sound of pool balls rolling through the tunnels could be heard from the basement where it was placed throughout the house. Also, the idea of separating Ray from his questionable friends wasn't working since they found a new pool hall at 252 Van Pelt Avenue... the home of Lou and Flo Fiore. Game of 8 Ball Handwritten story from the first of 6 pages that my dad sent to me. Ray loved the pool table, and he would play from early morning to late night. He became good enough to enter tournaments and win his share. Ray became well known in Staten Island pool circles and he got to a point where he could run 10, 15, 20, 25 balls in a row. Few players wanted to play against Ray so he started to go to bars in Manhattan and Brooklyn and he became a skilled 8 ball player for $5 to $10 a game. The game of 8 ball involves hitting the white cue ball into a rack of 15 balls. Of the 15 balls set up in a rack eight are solids (1 to 7) and the others are stripes (9 to 15). Players must pocket all balls in their designated group (solids or stripes) before pocketing the 8 ball in a designated pocket to win. When Ray aimed the cue ball at the rack he almost always got either a stripe or solid ball in the pocket. Then he methodically ran the other balls and then made the 8 ball. Ray became so good at 8 ball that few wanted to challenge him. Until he met "Sailor Bill". Sailor Bill My Uncle Ray playing billiards. Sailor Bill was sitting at a Brooklyn bar one day watching Ray polish off one player after another. Bill was a retired Navy man who was about 70 when 18-year-old Ray Fiore met him. He approached Ray at the Brooklyn bar and said "I would like to challenge you." Ray said "I don't want to take your money old man." Sailor Bill said "I'll take that chance. How much do you want to play for?" Ray said "One game for $5 dollars." Sailor Bill said, "Come on if its only one game lets play for $20." Ray said "If you insist." Ray said... "You can break". The old sailor studied the board picked out a pool stick and then proceeded to clear the table in a couple of minutes. Ray didn't know what hit him. After two rematches Ray was out $60 without taking a shot. They sat at the bar and Bill bought Ray a drink. He said "Ray you have a lot of potential. I can teach you a lot if you are interested." Ray said sure and for the next couple of months Sailor Bill was a frequent visitor to the Fiore house. Where Ray was able to run 25 balls in a row, Sailor Bill could run 100. He was right out of the movie with Jackie Gleason playing Minnesota Fats. Ray just playing around. Sailor Bill told Ray he saw the pool table in geometric terms, triangles, rectangles and squares and he knew where the cue ball was going to land 5 shots from now. After Sailor Bills lessons, Ray became better than ever. Throughout his life he never stopped playing pool and won many more games than he lost. The Final Hustle At Ray's funeral I gave a eulogy which was about one of Ray's last pool games. Tony (left) and Ray as adults, January 2014 It was great that at the end of our work careers we wound up at the same company... MarketSource Corporation in Cranbury, New Jersey. We had a Christmas luncheon and after it was over Ray asked a few of us to join him at this new restaurant in Cranbury that had a pool table. So about 6 of us joined Ray at this place and we sat at a table having drinks and watching this hot shot named Mikey polish off one player after another in 8 ball. So Ray approaches Mikey and says wanna play. Mikey says, "I don't want to take your money old man". Ray says no problem... How much you want to play for?" "How about $20... You can break". I'm thinking bad move Mikey. Five games later, Mikey is out $100 and he has taken only a few shots. He can't believe what happened to him. Then I look over and in the corner of the bar Mikey and Ray are talking intently. Then I see Ray hand over the $100 he just won back to Mikey... who leaves the place. As Ray returns to our table, we ask him why he gave Mikey his money back. Ray says Mikey told him he has a couple of young kids and the money was for Christmas toys. Then a bar patron who heard Ray's story chimes in... "You got to be kidding... Is that what he told you". Ray said yes and he even gave him $20 of his own money. The bar patron says... well Mikey is not married and has no kids. In fact, he is a big playboy. Ray's smile turns into a laugh. "Well, I guess the hustler got hustled". That was Ray... as kind a person out there. A great brother, husband, father and grandfather. I am so lucky to have him as a brother.

This is the third installment of my dad's stories, which are quickly becoming fan favorites from my audience. I have pulled my dad out of retirement to find a new career as blogger! To catch you up, the first story, Family Storytelling Tradition With Papa Fiore , is worth reading to give some context to this 3rd story. The second story, Discovering Staten Island Roots Through Family Storytelling , gives a bit more color about growing up in Staten Island. --------------------- Family Storytelling As I mentioned in my first article a few weeks ago my grandkids got bored with me reading children's books to them and they asked me to make up stories hence the creation of Little Johnny stories. These stories weren't entirely made up. Little Johnny was a classmate of mine in Mrs. McCarthy's 5th grade class at Public School 44 (known as PS 44) located in Mariners Harbor, Staten Island. The cast of my stories centered on 4 characters: Little Johnny Mrs. McCarthy Bully George Little Papa Little Johnny: He was only in my 5th grade class for one year. He transferred to PS 44 from an elementary school in Manhattan and lived a few houses from me. His father was a cameraman who filmed commercials for a large New York agency called BBD+O. One of their larger clients was Campbell Soup and they became famous for their "Mmm Mmm Good" slogan that became an integral part of every TV, print and radio commercial for many years. My dad's rendering of Little Johnny So, one day Little Johnny's dad thought it would be fun to take Little Johnny to an actual commercial shoot for Campbell's Soup. The premise of the commercial was to show an average family at home waiting for dinner. There was Mom, Dad, big sister and little brother looking somber until Mom announces that they are going to have Campbell's chicken noodle soup for dinner then the frowns all turn to smiles that get bigger when the soup is actually served. A voiceover then says, "That's why Campbell Soup is Mmm Mmm Good." The young boy who has been cast to be in the commercial has taken ill and cannot make the shoot. The director in desperation asks Little Johnny's dad if he can take his place. His dad says Little Johnny has never acted before and the director says there is no dialogue, all he has to do is wear a frown until Mom announces dinner and then he smiles, tastes the soup and smiles wider joining a very happy family setting. Little Johnny's dad tells him what he has to do and he says "Dad, I don't like chicken noodle soup". Little Johnny's dad says you will be getting $50 an hour, most shoots take 5 hours that means you will be making $250. I guess you didn't realize how much you suddenly got to like chicken noodle soup. Little Johnny says, "Right on Dad". So Little Johnny became a quasi-celebrity at PS 44 as the Campbell's commercial he was in played countless times on television. He became a favorite of Mrs. McCarthy who never had a TV star in her class before. He also became a favorite of Bully George who kept asking Johnny to get him into commercials. The Rooted & Refined Living Expert Tip:   "Even if it doesn't feel like it, there are always alternatives to difficult situations." As for me Little Papa I liked walking to school with him because he was fun and upbeat and he didn't let his instant fame go to his head. Mrs. McCarthy: My dad's rendering of Mrs. McCarthy Mrs. M was a typical old schoolteacher. She had a big sign on the wall that said: M Y O B Mrs. M also use to call her students out if they misbehaved. Her favorite line was: We have our General Eisenhower's and our General McArter's but you George are a general nuisance. Bully George had to repeat 5th grade because his grades were terrible. Mrs. McCarthy dreaded another year of him in her class, but her retirement was near and she figured she could tolerate him for a few more months. The rest of the class not so much. Bully George: My dad's rendering of Bully George His favorite saying was "If you don't do what I ask I'm going to deck you". He was about a year older than everyone else in the class, about a foot taller and about 40 pounds heavier. His frustration about getting left back made him take it out on the rest of the class especially the boys. He methodically singled out one boy a day to meet him after school and then before a decent crowd of onlookers would wrestle the boy down and make him say I give up. He never involved any girls. The only boys who were immune from this ordeal were Little Johnny because of his celebrity and George wanting to be on TV and Little Papa because I gave him my homework to copy, a small price to pay from having George sit on you. Little Papa: My dad's rendering of himself as a kid in his own stories In order not to confuse the grandkids, I kept the name Papa in all my stories. They only knew me by that name and to introduce Anthony or Tony (my real and nickname) would have created more confusion. So, in all the stories, I was Little Johnny's sidekick and I was "Little Papa". As I mentioned in my other stories, I lived in Mariners Harbor and went to PS 44 for 8 years. Ironically, many years after when I was in the business world, Campbell Soup became one of my company's biggest clients. More about that in future writings. Now that readers would be familiar with the cast after presenting their biographies, here is one of the grandkid's favorite Little Johnny stories. Bully George was getting bored with wrestling the boys in the class to the ground. Nobody even showed up to watch the show anymore. One day Bully George was walking to school with Little Johnny and I and he said I have an idea that could be profitable for me. "What's the idea" asked Little Johnny. Bully George proudly says I'm starting a company called Bully George Protection Company. As you know every day in the afternoon Mrs. McCarthy makes us take a 15-minute break to have a cookie and a container of milk. The cookie is free, but the milk money is 5 cents for a carton. We have 13 boys in the class. I will not include you Johnny or you Papa and of course myself, so that leaves 10 boys who will pay me 50¢ a day or $2.50 a week for protection. "That means they can't have milk with their cookies Bully George," said Little Johnny. I know Little Johnny, but it means they won't have to worry about being on the ground seeing my smiling face. So let me get this straight Bully George you are asking for money from the boys to protect them from you. If Mrs. McCarthy found out, she will march you to the principal's office and you might be spending another year in 5th grade. I know there is some risk but no risk no reward said George. So, George pursues this enterprising venture and is pleased to have all 10 boys participate. He doesn't feel sorry when their mouths are watering for milk to go along with their cookies. Mrs. McCarthy is clueless as to what is happening and thinks the boys might think the milk is sour. After a month, Bully George celebrates his 10 dollars by buying a fancy yo-yo and a Spalding ball. Little Johnny is not so amused by Bully George's business acumen, so he approaches the bully and details a plan for George to consider. He says George "Congrats on your business but if you want it to grow you are going to have to invest in it." "What do you mean Little Johnny" says George. Little Johnny says well you are going to need a salesman to get you new clients. I can do that job, but you will have to pay me 20¢ a day. Then you will need an accountant (Little Papa) to take care of your books and pay your taxes. And, you will need a marketing manager to develop an advertising campaign Bully George Protection Company. That will cost you another 20¢ each for Papa and the marketing manager (Little Sally). George says, "Great idea Little Johnny but I will be losing 10¢ a day". That's what happens to start-up companies George, but the investment will pay out over time. So, George follows Little Johnny's plan and in 5 months he is forced to declare bankruptcy. Little Johnny has outsmarted Bully George once again. Little Johnny and Little Papa returned all the money plus interest to the 10 classmate boys who had to contribute to George. Everyone in the class enjoyed their milk and cookie again- except Bully George who spent milk and cookie time in the principal's office.

This is the second story from my dad, Tony Fiore. If you missed the first one, Family Storytelling Tradition With Papa Fiore , it became a fan favorite. Below, my dad shares a bit about growing up in Staten Island along with his days in college. Staten Island Roots I would like to give a bit of a prelude, to my second story by telling about my family life growing up (Staten Island Roots). I was born and raised in Staten Island, New York. The smallest of the five boroughs of New York City, Staten Island is most known for its scenic ferry ride with views of the Statue of Liberty and the Manhattan skyline. Fiore Bros (you can see the name on the two pillars) circa 1950 maybe. If you have a relative from Staten Island that is older than 60, they will know of Fiore Brothers and the orange trucks. I was raised in a modest home in Mariners Harbor... known for its shipyards. My house on Van Pelt Avenue had more visitors than the local diner because my mom, Flo, always had something cooking that was homemade. My younger brother Ray was a great billiards player, and he and his friends headed to our basement where an old-fashioned pool table was located. The Rooted & Refined Living Expert Tip:   "Sitting around the kitchen table, smelling the scents of home cooking and great conversations, can elevate the sensory experience." My dad, Louis, was known as Louie the Bookkeeper. He was one of five Louis Fiore’s, all with different nicknames to distinguish them from one another... Louie the Oilman, Louie the Salesman, Louie the Dispatcher and Louie the Bossman. All worked for Fiore Brothers Fuel Oil Company, a firm established in the 1920’s by my grandfather Anthony and his two brothers... Ferdinand and Michael. They also had a sister Rose who was not involved in the business. Rose's husband Frank drove an oil truck for Fiore Bros for 30 years. This was not an easy job as many of the roads in Staten Island are narrow, winding, and have lots of hills. Page 4 of 6 from my dad's handwritten story Fiore Brothers survived the Great Depression of the early 1930’s by becoming a barter company and eventually rose to be the largest fuel oil company on Staten Island with 12 large oil trucks, a few coal trucks and 40 employees, mostly family. Anyone who married into the Fiore family was guaranteed a job which was a testament to the family values of the company. My dad preferred to be called Louie the Accountant, but Bookkeeper stuck for his entire life. When Fiore Brothers customers received their oil deliveries, they usually preferred to pay the Fiore Brothers delivery man after the oil was pumped into their tank. Some preferred to pay at the company office in Elm Park. One of those people was a Mr. P. His son was a Big Man on Campus at the local Staten Island college called Wagner College. His son, Al, was captain of the football team and President of one of the larger fraternities—Alpha Sigma Phi. So one in the early summer of 1959 Mr. P came into Fiore Brothers to pay his bill and he and my dad started chatting. My dad told him that his son Tony had just graduated Port Richmond High School and was enrolled to go to Wagner College. "Great" said Mr. P, "I'll tell my son Al about him, and he will get him into his fraternity." Sounded good but unfortunately it doesn't work that way. Fraternities and sororities have membership drives the beginning of each semester and then the members vote on who should get a bid to join. The President cannot dictate who becomes a member, so I am sure that when Al was told about me, he let his father know the procedure. However, Al's father never said another word about it, and I walked onto campus thinking I was a lock for Alpha Sigma Phi brotherhood. Alpha was one of 7 campus fraternities and what distinguished it from the rest was that 90% of its members were on the Wagner football team—I was a baseball player. The Wagner College Experience The other fraternities, Phi Sigma Kappa was for the brainy guys; Delta Nu was our Animal House, etc. So Al, with the pressure of his dad, tried to sell me to the Alpha brotherhood. It wasn't easy but he didn't want his dad to have to face my dad and say "I'm sorry your son doesn't have what it takes to be Alpha Sig." Al took on the challenge and somehow persuaded the Alpha brotherhood of 70 members to vote me in. I proudly accepted my membership and made some lifelong friends because of it. More about my friends in future writings. This was the winning fraternity, Phi Sigma Kappa, which is not the one my dad joined. Even Delta Nu, which was considered the Animal House of the college fraternities, came in second place with barely any practice. The biggest day of the year for fraternities and sororities is Songfest... a big singing event that is held every May and it packs the Field House and is a worthy fundraiser for various Staten Island charities. Winning is a big, prestigious deal and I couldn't believe how many practices would be held before the big, nighttime event with an orchestra and spotlights. Each participating fraternity was assigned a professor from the music department to coach and mentor us. The song we chose was "Carolina in the Morning" originally sung by Al Jolson. It was a catchy upbeat song, and our fraternity was confident we could win with it. So we are having our first practice and the music professor assigned to us, a stern bespeckled man in his late 50's Mr. Denby, summons me to talk privately with him. He says, "Mr. Fiore I know this means a lot to you to sing at Songfest, but your singing is throwing others off. I am requesting you get up on stage with the rest of the group but please only mouth the words." I protest to no avail, and I sheepishly get back to practice, and lip sync this fun song. Mr. Denby, after a few weeks of practices feels we are ready to go and that we have a chance of winning. The night of Songfest arrives. I didn't have the heart to tell my parents who were attending that I was banished from letting a sound come from my mouth, so I put on my tuxedo and stuck my carnation in my lapel and went off to the big event. The crowd is at capacity, and the orchestra starts playing the prelude and all of a sudden, they start singing: "Nothing could be finer than to be in Carolina in the morning. No one could be sweeter than my sweetie when I meet her in the morning." I can't take it. All of a sudden, I start singing the words and I see looks of dismay from my brothers next to me on stage. I can't believe I defiantly disobeyed our conductor's request. Neither can my fraternity brothers who look like they lost a football game on a last second pass. We wind up finishing 3rd and I became the scapegoat. For years after that at every fraternity reunion someone greets me and brings it up. "I can't believe you would do that Fiore. It is so unlike you. We hardly knew you existed until that night." Oh well, I'm not going to let a bunch of sore losers ruin what could have been a great singing career. Till the next episode, Childhood Lessons and Family Storytelling: A Papa Fiore Memor y, which is now posted.

As I look out the window just now, I am watching the tree branches whisk together in the constant wind from today's weather. It reminded me of trying to fly a kite when I was a kid. Each of the kids creating their own Newport kite flying experience at Brenton Point State Park Flying a kite when you are little is one of the great fun, sensory experiences we didn't realize we were having. Most of us were probably trying to fly kites that cost only a few dollars from the local store and tried with all of our might to run as fast as we could to get it up in the air and fly. We would run, and it would fall, and we would try again and again, sometimes in our yards when there was no wind at all. Wind or no wind, the problem most of us experienced was that the kites we were trying to fly were not really designed well. However, if we did get the kite to fly, even for a few seconds, it was the greatest accomplishment of the day, bringing smiles through dinner and stories to our friends that it was flying miles up in the air. Here is the open field outside of our kitchen window. The lack of obstruction causes the wind to whip onto the side of our house. There are a few places I think about when I think of the best places to fly a kite. The first as it turns out is the big open field next to my house, with nothing to slow down the wind, it often whips across the field to the side of our house. We notice it more lately from the windchimes we set up to prevent (unsuccessfully) the woodpeckers from making our house look like Swiss cheese with all of the holes they are creating. The second really windy spot we visit is in Aruba. In the area of Palm Beach, there are trade winds that flow 24 hours a day, which really help the heat feel manageable. Because of these trade winds, there are so many kite and wind surfers which are so much fun to watch. I tried kite surfing once and found it extremely challenging as I kept smashing into the water more than I was standing on the board. The Rooted & Refined Living Expert Tip:   "Reconnect with kite flying to experience the joy of curiosity and wonder that comes with your childhood self." The third place, which is going to be the focus of my story is the winds at Brenton Point State Park in Newport, Rhode Island. Before I get back to the kites, I would like to spend a few minutes to share my love of Newport. I didn't start going to Newport until I met Mary Beth. She grew up in Rhode Island and her mom, dad, and her would go to Newport on a regular basis for as long as she can remember. On a Saturday morning multiple times a year, they would pack it up the car with a picnic and spend the entire day there. Their favorite spot was at Brenton Point, which boasts a rocky coastline, a view of the island of Jamestown, and a beautiful state park, which is usually full of people just enjoying the weather, view, and a Del's Lemonade . Del's is a Rhode Island staple consisting of a semi frozen (slushy style) lemonade, mixed with the juice and the rind of the lemon, and sugar, served typically by a local high school or college student. There is a Del's Lemonade food truck every time we go to Brenton Point. Of course, Mary Beth and her parents were always in line getting at least a few Del's during their visits. I met Mary Beth at Bryant College (now University) in Smithfield, RI, about 40 minutes from Newport. It wasn't long before I started to visit Newport on a regular basis, sometimes just the two of us, and others with her parents on those same Saturday picnics in the summer, and then with the kids. Newport has so many great activities. Outside of Brenton Point State Park, there is the scenic drive on Ocean Ave (sometimes referred to as Ocean Drive), as it winds around the coastline. On Ocean Ave is the iconic Castle Hill Inn, as well as some beautiful old homes including one owned by Jay Leno. As you drive up from Brenton Point, past Jay Leno's house is what Newport is probably best known for, which is the historic mansions on Bellevue Avenue, with the largest one, The Breakers, at over 65,000 square feet. These mansions are available for tours and weddings (if you can afford it. I heard the average wedding in these mansions cost about $250,000). The Newport Mansions are now a part of the historical society but were once owned by New York's elite like the Vanderbilt and Astor families, until inheritance tax caused many of the children not to be able to afford them. On the opposite side of the mansions is the Cliff Walk, which is a 3-mile paved (mostly) trail on the ocean with one side of a view of the ocean (and view of Middletown) and the other side a view of the mansions. Bowen's Wharf in downtown Newport during the winter off season, which is why it is so quiet on the streets. Newport is also home to a great downtown on the waterfront, with so many boutique shops, restaurants, and bars off of the famous Thames Street. The most famous area is Bowen's Wharf, which is home to one of our favorite restaurants, The Mooring (actually on Sayer's Wharf according to their website, but just a few steps away ) , and a great tour company around the harbor and island, Sightsailing of Newport . One of their boat captains is also my friend and one of my college roommates, Jeff Sevich. Jeff is the Captain of the Starlight boat, which can host 2-6 guests. With so many great topics on Newport to talk about, maybe I will do a separate post on the Starlight tour, bringing in some of my college memories. Jeff and his wife Nancy (who we also met and became friends with at college), both "retired" 10 years ago and moved full time to Newport and now fix up and rent homes. If you have an interest in staying in the Newport area, I would highly recommend renting one of their two rental properties, Open Concept Beach House and Beach House , both located in Middletown, RI, just one town over from Newport. Emma and me at one of our picnics. For me, I think it's now been 30 years since I have been going to Newport and have so many other places and activities to share in future posts. For this story, I will stick to Brenton Point. I started joining Mary Beth and her parents for the picnic's each year and as we started having kids, the one car ultimately turned into two having to fit 7 people and all of the picnic items. Picnics with her parents were events, not just packing a few peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Her dad, and now passed on to Mary Beth, would make Italian subs with all of the fixings and chips. We upgraded from a card table to an 8' table, tent, chairs, and a few TV trays to eat off of. This is why we needed two cars. I keep trying to convince Mary Beth that we should bring down the Ooni to make pizza's but in the back of my mind, I know that is a project when we are at home and it would be a bigger challenge for us in a secondary location. We would spend all day there, typically getting there around 11:00 in the morning (following our 90-minute drive from home), usually getting the same spot at the end of one of the parking lots so we could have the extra space on the side to play games or fly kites. Newport Kite Flying Experience Kite flying at Brenton point has a combination of little kids getting their first kites to experienced adults using two hands to do tricks. We did invest in some good quality kites from Newport Kites when the kids were little so they could actually fly the kites. I can remember having to hold the string with one hand while the kids would hold onto the handle because if they let go the kite would certainly fly away, especially being hundreds of feet in the air. Emma running with her kite at Brenton Point State Park As an adult, it was so fun to watch the excitement in our kid's eyes and the smile on their faces when the kite was up in the air. As well, it is also fun to watch the experienced adult kite flyers perform their tricks and realize how much skill is needed to make such beautiful art in the sky. I think the last time we went; I let the string go as far as it could unwind which was really fun to see how high it could go and then spend what felt like hours trying to bring it back to Earth. Newport Kite Festival Every year in July, Newport hosts its annual Kite Festival. This year will be its 40th anniversary, held at Brenton Point State Park. If you want to see a visually spectacular event, spend time with family and friends, take some amazing photos, or just sit in the wonder and awe of kite flying at its best, this festival is for you. And the best part, it's free. This year's festival will be held on July 11-12 at Brenton Point State Park, rain or shine. To plan your event, visit Newport Kite Festival . "I'm changing lives one kite at a time. When families feel the wind's power through a simple string, something profound happens." - Ron Kitt, Festival Director Frequently Asked Questions Is Brenton Point State Park free to visit? Yes, Brenton Point State Park is free. Many families come for large picnics, and every spot has a view of the ocean. Are there trash facilities at Brenton Point State Park? No, it is a carry in, carry out policy. This means that if you have a picnic, your are responsible to bring your own trash bags. Can I buy a kite while I am at Brenton Point State Park? Yes, Newport Kites has a mobile truck right on the field at Brenton Point State Park. What activities are at the Newport Kite Festival? In addition to watching the kites and being near the ocean (what more could you want), there will be a candy drop for the kids to enjoy. Plus, you will be there with your friends and family, so it is bound to be a great time. Start Your Own Kite Flying Sensory Experience If you are looking to reconnect with the wonder of your childhood self, a Newport Kite flying experience will allow you to reach for the sky! Try it today and let me know your thoughts in the comments! For Transparency: Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. If you purchase through them, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. I only recommend products I truly love and use myself.

If you are following along with my family stories, I recently shared about how I helped Matthew and Michael start small businesses while they were in high school in a 2-part series ( Part 1 and Part 2 ). Papa with Emma, Michael, and Matthew on a hike, October 2009. I share all this as a backdrop to my next topic, family storytelling, which is my dad, or as the kids call him, Papa. I have shared a few mentions of him in my stories, most recently, about our trip to California last week and the connection to us buying the most comfortable bed . During this visit, I was sharing with my dad some additional details about this website and his interest to learn more. On the plane ride home, I came up with the idea that he could be a guest writer on the site. My dad is a great storyteller, though it is sometimes hard to determine where the real story ends and the exaggeration begins. I also think that each time my dad tells a story, they have gotten a bit more exaggerated, always keeping us wondering how real or how imaginary his stories are. As I was pondering what angle I could have him share his stories, nestled in the Rooted & Refined Living lifestyle section, I initially thought his 60 and 70-year-old friendships that started in high school and college respectively could be a great starting point. The Rooted & Refined Living Expert Tip:   "Don't worry about accuracy. Preserving family history through storytelling can be a great way to pass on memories and feelings of nostalgia to future generations." We bounced around a few ideas and within a few days, my dad shared his first story, and true to form, he wrote about an imaginary person that was born from real life events of his childhood. My kids heard these stories all the time and now they will be chronicled as a part of this website as my dad shares his stories growing up in Staten Island through his friendships today that have lasted 60 and 70 years. With no additional introduction, here is my dad's first story. There will be more to come. One last thing. My dad writes all of his stories on yellow legal pads and then takes pictures. I then use AI to convert it to text which is a huge time saver for both of us. Papa's handwritten notes. He also writes in all caps as you can see. I used Google Gemini to translate this photo to the text below. Papa's Introductory Story Hi, my name is Tony Fiore. I am Steve's Dad and I live in Orange County, California. Steve lives in a small town west of Boston. He recently came to visit me and enjoy some sunshine after enduring some very cold periods in the Northeast. His web site, Rooted & Refined Living, is doing very well and he asked if I would like to contribute some articles based on my life experiences. I agreed and this will be my first contribution. Steve and his wife Marybeth have 3 children... Matthew 23, a recent Bryant grad and currently employed in Human Resources. Michael, 21, a senior at Keene State College and Emma, 19, a sophomore at University of Connecticut. About 15 years ago, I was visiting Steve on a cold January day and the kids who were 6, 4 and 2 wanted me to tell them a story. So I made up a story about a young boy named Little Johnny. I introduce other characters who interacted with Little Johnny such as George, the school bully, and Mrs. McCarthy, his teacher. The stories became so popular with the kids that when I finished one they wanted another. I got a kick out of how much laughter they got out of these made up characters and stories. Little Johnny was always in trouble but somehow figured a way to come out on top at the end of the story. Then, on a cold wintery day as I was nearing the end of my visit, Marybeth said Matthew would like you to walk him to the school bus stop. I said sure and bundled myself up for the walk to the bus stop with little Matthew who was in first grade back then. When we got to the bus stop there were about 10 moms and dads and their sons and daughters waiting for the bus to arrive. I exchanged a few hellos and stood in line for the bus. At that moment Matthew in a clear, loud voice says "Papa (that was my grandfather name), my mom says 'All your friends are imaginary'." Everything went silent and I could see moms and dads yanking their kids hands and pulling them away from me. I'm thinking, OMG what must they be thinking? Should I try to explain that I have real friends? How the heck does a 6 year old know the word imaginary? When the heck is this bus coming? So I did nothing – just stood there looking guilty waiting what seemed like an eternity for the bus. Here is a visit to Lake Mead on our trip to Las Vegas. We flew out and my dad drove to meet us. Then, the bus came and as Matthew was boarding he said "Papa are you going to pick me up when I get out of school?". Before I could answer some woman with a scowl on her face says "I hope not". I'm sure those parents had a good chuckle at my expense. Anyway, that's my first contribution. I have a few others and maybe some of my imaginary friends will pop up. If you enjoyed Papa's first trip down memory lane, you can read his next story here: Discovering Staten Island Roots Through Family Storytelling Do you have a funny story that your parents or grandparents tell over Sunday dinners? If so, please share in the comments section below.

During the workweek, my current daily routine for selecting footwear is pretty basic, unlike the Allen Edmonds Leather Quality dress shoes, belts, wallets, and shoe care accessories I will review below. I walk downstairs to my home office in the basement and slip on my very fuzzy slippers to keep my feet warm. Roughly 8-10 hours a day, they are on my feet during the workweek acting as a barrier between my feet and the cold basement floor. The basement is finished but the thin fake wood floor sits on top of a concrete slab that never seems to warm up, even in the height of the summer. Me working a few years in 2020 with Franklin (left) and Lincoln. There was a time in my career where I wore dress shoes on a daily basis. In fact, I wore them so much, I had to find a cobbler to fix the soles as I had put holes in them. I actually miss the times having to get dressed up and go out every day to meet customers (I have been in sales for most of my career). I have a closet full of dress shirts, dress pants, and dress shoes sitting in the closet collecting dust. Speaking of dust, my son Michael is graduating from college in a month and needed some dress shoes for the occasion. We went into my closet for him to try on some of my shoes, as we have the same shoe size. When I went to pull out the shoes, I ran my finger across the front only to find a layer of dust. It had been a while since I wore the pair that he ultimately borrowed for his big day. I am a bit embarrassed about it as I could write my initials in the dust. I used to have covers for my shoes but since I was wearing them every day, I ultimately discarded them. The Rooted & Refined Living Expert Tip:   "Take the time to take care of your shoes with polish, shoe trees, and a shoehorn. Your feet will love you for it." Given Michael's planned career choice of being a high school wood shop teacher in combination with being a white water rafting guide in the summers, I don't think dress shoes will be high on his list of things he needs for himself. Matthew currently has a corporate job and there may be a time where he will get more dressed up and we did buy him a pair of nice shoes last year following graduation (more on that in a bit). Emma and me at Bring your Child to Work day in 2015 (with me wearing my Allen Edmonds shoes). We were in the Link at Travelers Insurance, who was my customer. A few years earlier on the 50th anniversary of the Travelers Red Umbrella, they decorated the link (passage way connecting two buildings in Hartford, CT). It was so well received, they decided to keep them there, even until this day. Growing up, I remember my stepdad, Bill, talking about shoe care. He worked in a warehouse so he didn't need them every day but on special occasions, he would put them on, such as for a wedding. The dress shoe was a popular brand, which is still around today as a premium footwear company. He also would talk to me about using shoe trees to help keep the shape of the shoe and using a shoehorn (which I thought was the coolest thing when I was little). For most of my childhood and into my college years, the brand he referenced I always viewed as a high-end shoe brand. When I got to college, my dad and stepmom took me out the store to buy a nice pair of shoes for me to go on interviews. I was probably 20 or 21 at the time. I remember it vividly as we went into Nordstrom and the salesperson picked out a pair of black Allen Edmonds. There were a few things I specifically remember about that pair of shoes. The cost was one that stood out, I believe at the time was about $200. This was a lot of money for a pair of dress shoes, especially as I worked at Kinney Shoes during high school and the most expensive pair was about $35. The second thing I remember is they were super comfortable. 212 Steps to make Allen Edmonds Dress Shoes! Fast forward a few years. I had just started a new job and was working in an office, visiting customers. This meant I needed to add to my collection of dress clothes. I don't recall exactly what happened with the Allen Edmonds shoes I had but one thing I remember is that specific shoe was really narrow and really didn't fit me as well as I had hoped. As a result, I think I donated them and went and purchased two more pairs of shoes. My friend and I went to one of the popular mall retail stores and I got a pair in black and one in burgundy. They were timeless styles as I had planned to wear these shoes for a long time, especially for the amount of money I spent on them, which was $140 each. I remember that because I didn't want to spend the $400 for two pairs of Allen Edmonds and I thought $140 was a great deal, especially since it was a reputable higher end shoe company. These are my black classic Allen Edmonds. They have to be close to 25 years old or more. I also purchased the shoe trees and shoe polish to keep them clean, even though that process never came close to going to a shoeshine guy in NYC or the airport. By the way, you may have a better chance of winning the lottery than finding a shoeshine person nowadays, but 30 years ago, it was still very popular. My very popular brand of shoes (remember I bought two of them), were pretty stiff and weren't easy to walk in. But I thought that this was a really good brand and it just takes time. After months of wearing these shoes every day, typically rotating between the two colors, they still felt as stiff as they day I bought them. As you can imagine, this was a big disappointment. I was out $360 of my own money plus the $200 my dad and stepmom spent on the original pair. My favorite pair. I think I have had to get them resoled a few times over the years. I had a few choices in front of me. I could either suffer or hope that someday the current shoes I had would break in. I could buy a pair of shoes from the brand my stepdad had, but honestly, I associated those with the older generation and not something someone in their early 20's would wear. Or I could look back at Allen Edmonds and make sure I purchased a pair of shoes that actually fit. Allen Edmonds Leather Quality I ultimately decided on a classic black dress shoe from Allen Edmonds. They were about $200 but I made the decision that these were going to be a shoe that lasted a lifetime. And it's true as I still have them today. They were very comfortable from the start without having me to break them in. Recrafting shoes is an art. This is a fun video to watch if you love to learn how things are made. After a while of wearing them, commuting on the train from NJ to New York City, and then walking the streets of Manhattan a few days a week, the shoes got their workout, many times walking about 2 miles a day for each trip. My three Allen Edmonds dress belts to match my shoe collection Because of my daily wear, two things happened next. First, I wore out the soles, probably after about 5-10 years and had to get them resoled. I used Allen Edmonds service first and the quality was great. I remember the full package was about $100 at the time (or at least to my recollection) and did that once or twice over the years. I did ultimately find a local cobbler to repair the shoes at about half the cost, but finding one is like winning the lottery as well. The second event that happened was I was so happy with my purchase, I bought two more pairs, one in brown and one in burgundy, both in the same classic style as the black. Since then, I have purchased 2 more pairs of dress shoes from Allen Edmonds, both loafers. I found that I wear my black loafers more than any other due to the easy slip on an off. My boat shoes. I also purchased three dress belts to match the three original colors as I was always told that your tie and socks should match/complement each other and your belt and shoes should match. Not sure if that is true but that is the adage I have lived by all these years. My belts really need a polishing which I only think I did once for all the years I have owned them. I used to polish my shoes every few months but now, it's more like every few years given the infrequency of wearing them. I have two other Allen Edmonds products. I have a pair of boat shoes that I wear when we go to Aruba, as well as my wallet, which I think I have had for 20 years now. I couldn't be happier with my decision 30 years ago to buy Allen Edmonds, and I became a repeat customer over the years, with my most recent purchase for my son, Matthew. If you are in the market for a pair of dress shoes, and honestly, a nice pair of stylish and comfortable shoes, I highly recommend Allen Edmonds. Don't make the same mistakes I did early on. Frequently Asked Questions How long do Allen Edmonds products last?? A few of my shoes are close to 30 years old, with just the soles refinished a few times. They look good as new. Does Allen Edmonds offer shoe repair? Yes, Allen Edmonds offers recrafting services. You can access them on their website . Do you recommend a leather or rubber soles for your dress shoes? Personally, I like the leather soles, but we purchased the rubber soles for my son who I knew would appreciate the longevity and grip. Start Your Own Allen Edmonds Sensory Experience If you have a passion for looking good and being comfortable at the same time, step into a pair of Allen Edmonds shoes. They will elevate your sensory experience. Try it today and let me know your thoughts in the comments! For Transparency: Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. If you purchase through them, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. I only recommend products I truly love and use myself. As well, since most of my collection is from the past, I have selected products that are similar in style in the links below.

I grew up listening to stories of my dad's career. This is part one of his journey. ------------------------------ My business career was one of extremes. The first half of my career was working for Fortune 100 companies - Colgate Palmolive; Johnson & Johnson; Warner-Lambert and American Express. The second half started with a 3-man company. I graduated Wagner College with a degree in Business Administration specializing in accounting. I received an MBA from Pace University in Financial Management. Fortune 100 Career Journey I started out as a cost accountant with Colgate at their Jersey City, N.J. plant. I worked in a bullpen area with the sound of old-fashioned calculators throughout the day. Most of the accountants graduated from nearby St. Peters College. Two years after I joined one of my Colgate associates got a job with Johnson & Johnson in New Brunswick, N.J. A few months after he joined J&J, he called me up and said they had a job opening and to give it a shot. I did and I got the job making a few thousand a year more than at Colgate. I worked five years at J&J and my last boss got a job with Warner-Lambert in Morris Plains, N.J. He called and said a job working for him as a senior accountant was mine if I wanted it. My Fortune 100 Career Journey continued and I took the job in the Consumer Products Division doing P&Ls for each brand in the division... brands such as Listerine, Efferdent, Trident, Dentyne, Rolaids and Halls Cough Drops. I worked very closely with the Product Managers on each brand. The largest brand was Listerine, a market leader product that dominated the mouthwash category. The Group Manager on Listerine was a man named Steve Rothchild. He had a degree from Columbia and an MBA from Harvard. All the product managers had MBAs from the best universities. One day Steve approached me and says marketing a product is so much more than making commercials and going to sales conferences in Florida or Nassau. There is day to day involvement with market research, trade promotion, consumer promotion, shipping, costs, etc. I need someone who can work the numbers for me... "How would you like to become a Product Manager on Listerine?" I said sure Steve, but I don't have the MBA credentials. He said the ones who have these MBAs don't want to get involved with the numbers. They want to go to New York City and work with J. Walter Thompson, our ad agency, developing TV and print commercials. Then they want to go to the Palm with their agency counterpart for a steak dinner. I need someone who can get me the numbers I need accurately and on time. Steve was a real up and comer at W-L and was able to sell his Division President to give me the job. Current view of the competition between Listerine and Scope, sitting on a CVS shelf. I couldn't have joined the Listerine marketing team at a more critical time. Procter and Gamble had recently launched Scope mouthwash, and their advertising campaign was built around the fact it had the same germ kill efficacy but with a fresh minty taste. Listerine's typical user was older and skewed male by 2-1. Scope's was younger and skewed women by 2-1. Scope was beginning to erode Listerine's dominant share. A big meeting between the Listerine marketing team and J. Walter Thompson account executives took place. They came up with an ad campaign for Listerine that ranks as one of the greatest of all time. The campaign for Listerine took on Scope head on. It recognized Listerine tasted like medicine, but it worked. It also addressed the fact that Listerine users mostly gargled once a day in the morning, so the campaign drove home a simple message: Listerine Antiseptic—"The Taste People Hate Twice A Day." The commercial went after usage over users. It helped stabilize the brand and give Listerine the time to develop a sister brand... Listermint. You have to love YouTube as I was able to find this commercial from 1973 My job was to develop consumer in store Listerine displays, sweepstakes, coupons and trade incentives to keep from going out of stock. An interesting sidebar to this is that I worked with a lower-level creative person who was just starting at J. Walter Thompson. His name was James Patterson who has become one of the bestselling authors of all time. Patterson rose up the ranks at JWT and became Creative Director. He left the agency when his first novel featuring Alex Cross became a best seller. At Warner-Lambert I was offered the position of Director of International Marketing. I went to every Latin American and Asian company in the 5 years I had the job. My main claim to success was as a strategic planning facilitator. I would ask the questions regarding all the internal and external factors affecting their country business. Then we would develop 5-year growth plans and action plans to meet timetables. Page 1 of my dad's story. Internal factors are personnel, products, assets, liabilities, R&D. External factors are competition, government regulations, technology, legal, environmental. Internal factors can be controlled for the most part. External factors cannot be controlled (an example is COVID). My work in International Marketing attracted some suitors... the most interesting and lucrative was American Express where I worked for three years as Vice President of International Marketing. Then the man who brought me into the company and was my boss left and my new boss and I didn't connect. So, for the first time in my 18-year business career I was out of work. Compounding the situation was that the job market was one of the worst ever. At that point I did a strategic plan about myself. I analyzed my strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats. I came to the conclusion maybe it was time to join a smaller company. In Part II of my career, I'll go into the second half of my story.

As a child of the 80’s, I am way too familiar with the Ginsu knife commercial (video is linked below). Do you remember it? The Ginsu commercials were all over the TV and it was fascinating to watch as a kid. These knives were so sharp, they cut through tin cans as well as tomatoes with ease. What they were playing up is your frustration that your knives weren’t sharp and could barely cut through an over easy egg. My HORL Rolling Knife Sharpener sitting on my Boos Block Cutting Board When I was a kid, and I was a bit embarrassed to share that up until recently, there were only three options for dealing with dull knives. You lived with it, you went to a professional to sharpen it, or you bought a new one. I think most people either just lived with it or wound up buying a new one. Regardless of your knife, don't forget to leverage a great wood cutting board to protect your blade from prematurely dulling.     Summertime Mistakes When I was in high school, probably around the age of 17, I saw an advertisement in the newspaper for a part-time summer job. I remember it vividly. I drove up to a small office building in Edison, NJ and attended an informational session about Cutco Knives. These knives promised something very similar to Ginsu in that they were sharp and you needed the entire set that cost at least a few hundred dollars (maybe more but my memory is a bit fuzzy on this one). I was so excited about it and all I had to do was pay $25 to get started and they handed me a set to go sell. The Rooted & Refined Living Expert Tip:   "With a sharp knife, it just glides through the food. Sharpen your knives regularly to experience the feeling of cutting through your food like it's a hot knife on soft butter." I went home and shared the “new job” with my mom and stepdad, Bill, and they shared that while it was probably legitimate, this was not something that I should be pursuing. The selling premise was that you would have to sell directly to family and friends of family… of which they weren’t keen on me pushing these expensive knives onto our family and friends. The concept is very similar to selling life insurance. Later that day, I took a trip back to the Cutco office and returned the knives and got my money back. Again, my memory is a bit fuzzy, but it is possible my mom or Bill called the Cutco sales manager or wrote a letter explaining I was 17 and this was not something I should be participating in (I wonder if my mom remembers this story). Coincidently, my college roommate of three years, Bill, sold Cutco knives during one of the summer breaks and was wildly successful. My New Knife Set When Mary Beth and I got married (now 27 years ago), we had a knife set on our registry. For about 20 of those years, we had the same set. I never really thought much about sharpening it as I just learned to live with dull knives. We each had our own chef’s knife, and the set came with a few other smaller knives, along with some steak knives. Over the years, on Mary Beth’s trips up to Maine with her mom, they purchased a few other serrated knives that we would use for cutting tomatoes and other soft items that our original set couldn’t cut. It wasn’t until about 7 or 8 years ago that we saw a vendor at a farmers market stand offering to sharpen knives. We started talking about it with one of our neighbors and he offered to do it the next time we saw him as he used his belt sander in his basement. Our newly sharpened knives gave us a new lease on our existing set for a few years. The test that I was fascinated by was our newly sharpened knives could now cut through tomatoes with relative ease. All was good until two things happened. Mary Beth’s knife handle broke and I decided it was time for me to get a new chef’s knife. As I have shared in previous posts, I am not happy with my current chef’s knife, so I won’t be posting a recommendation about it (It cuts but I just don’t like the feel of it). Over the course of a few months, we both had new knives and they were sharp and all was good. Over time, I realized that I should expect more from my knives and they should cut tomatoes with no effort at all. When they started to get dull, I brought up the conversation to our son Michael and he shared that from the initial research he did, HORL was the best option. HORL Rolling Knife Sharpener HORL2 Ceramic Honing Disc (opposite side is the Diamond Grinding Disc) I did a bunch of research on the topic of knife sharpening as there are a few different kinds including whetstone, which seemed a bit more complicated than the effort I wanted to expend. I then looked at HORL Rolling Knife Sharpener and did some research going to a few of the standard product review sites. The feedback was all the same, regardless of the site. Whetstone is a good option if you are more of a professional chef or if you want precise control, but if you want chef quality without the effort, HORL is the way to go. As I dug into my research, there were a lot of lookalike options to HORL but the reviews, both written and via YouTube, were that the cheaper versions don’t glide as nice and didn’t sharpen as quickly and efficiently. The great thing about HORL is it’s small, packed away under my cabinet, and only needs to come up every 6-12 months (I am sure there are specific recommendations as to when to sharpen your knife, but I use my tomato test. If my knife starts to struggle to cut the tomato or my tomato gets smushed in anyway by my knife, it’s time to sharpen it. By the way, I use my chef’s knife to cut everything now including very small grape tomatoes. If you are in the market for a knife sharpener, I highly recommend HORL. It is simple to use, offers two “settings” of 15 degrees (Japanese knives) and 20 degrees (American knives) based on your knife origin, which attaches via magnet to the knife. It offers a diamond cut circular end that just rolls along the knife to sharpen. The other side is used to just smooth out any rougher edges. The paper test. Your knife is sharpened when you take a clean sheet of copy/printer paper and hold it with one hand and then cut through it. If it cuts with a sharp, clean cut of the paper, you are good to go. Two other key points to know, if you aren’t familiar already. First, a dull knife is more dangerous to cut food than a sharp knife due to the additional effort you need to place in cutting, leading to more injuries. Second, most (if not all) professional chefs will recommend that if you are going to spend any money on a kitchen utensil, it should be a good chef’s knife. Many will say you don’t need any other knives. To that end, I don’t use the serrated knives anymore to cut tomatoes, only my HORL sharpened chef’s knife.   Last part of the story. My mom never really liked to cook although I thought she was a good cook. She often complained and after I moved out, she didn’t cook or entertain like she used to. Mary Beth and I thought it would be a great idea about 25 years ago to get my mom and Bill a new set of knives as we liked our new set from our wedding. Instead of buying them a good chef’s set, we got a bunch of serrated chef’s knives which were a flop of a gift. Serrated chef’s knives just don’t cut it😊 Frequently Asked Questions How long does it take to sharpen a knife using the HORL sharpener? It just takes a minute or two per side. It is really quick and with just a few passes back and forth, you will feel like you have a brand-new knife! Is it more dangerous to have a sharp knife than a dull one? Actually, it is more dangerous to have a dull knife. Dull knives will often require more pressure which can cause the knife to slip and cause more accidents. What is your favorite food to cut with your knives after they are sharpened? I love the smell of freshly cut cilantro, scallions, limes, and tomatoes when I am making guacamole. Do you have a favorite cutting board to use with your knives? Yes, we use and Edge Grain Boos Block from John Boos. Start Your Own Knife Sharpening Sensory Experience If you have a passion for cooking food at home, having a sharp knife is a requirement and it will elevate your sensory experience in the cooking process. Try it today and let me know your thoughts in the comments! For Transparency: Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. If you purchase through them, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. I only recommend products I truly love and use myself.

Cover image by Aleksander Popovski Dick Taylor Belize 72% Craft Dark Chocolate How It All Started Welcome to my chocolate journey! If you’ve ever wondered what makes the complexities of craft dark chocolate so special, this Dick Taylor Chocolate review is for you. It starts with the manual letter-pressed packaging to the snap of the bar, the aroma of a tropical destination, to every small bite slowly giving your taste buds the sensory experience they were craving. Also, if you are making a trip to the Hawaiian island of Kauai and want to experience an amazing tour of a Cacao Farm, book a trip to Lydgate Farms . Let me take you back to where it all began. My middle son, Michael, had a love for anything truck-related. We watched countless episodes of garbage and fire trucks on DVD. As he grew older, we started taping and enjoying Mike Rowe’s TV show, Dirty Jobs . We became fans of Mike Rowe, watching his adventures over and over again. Collection of current Dick Taylor specialty items including the Belize 72% Dark Chocolate, 72% Tanzania Dark Chocolate Bar with California Black Mission Figs, 68% Tanzania Dark Chocolate, Chocolate Covered Almonds, and Madagascar Cocoa Nibs Discovering Dick Taylor Chocolate Fast forward to the fall of 2014. I was at a technology conference where Mike Rowe was the keynote speaker. He had just wrapped up his long-running tenure on Dirty Jobs and was starting a new show called Somebody’s Gotta Do It on CNN. Mike shared stories about Dirty Jobs and introduced the unique co-founders of Dick Taylor Chocolates, Adam Dick and Dustin Taylor. These two carpenters decided one day to make chocolate. Their first manufacturing site was in a lumber yard, but they have since moved to Eureka, CA. That moment inspired me to order my first bar of chocolate from them. I fell in love with it! Here is the 15-minute episode if you’d like to watch it. You’ll get a real sense of the uniqueness and passion of Adam and Dustin. My hope is to someday visit their store. I keep trying to get them to host virtual tasting sessions, like the ones they do in-store. How to Enjoy Craft Chocolate Each day, typically after lunch and dinner, I grab a piece of chocolate to savor. I even started traveling with it! But as you can imagine, this isn’t the kind of chocolate most kids like. It’s not from the famous brand in Pennsylvania. To get the most out of your experience, unwrap the chocolate, close your eyes, and smell it. Then, bring it to your ear to hear the signature snap of perfectly tempered chocolate. Only now should you place it on your tongue and let it slowly melt. Resist the urge to bite it. Let it melt in your mouth to fully experience the taste. The Rooted & Refined Living Expert Tip:   "Notice the packaging itself and the tasting notes. Treat the unwrapping of the package as part of the elevated sensory experience. Once you unwrap the bar, hold it near your ear to hear the snap of the perfectly tempered chocolate. Smell it to experience the flavors and then finally taste, leaving it on your tongue and let the flavors melt into your taste buds." Dick Taylor Chocolate Review For my Dick Taylor Chocolate review, my two favorites are the Belize and Madagascar chocolates. I usually buy them in bulk at 5 to 10 at a time. I also mix in a few different varieties with each order. Each month, they offer a limited-edition bar that sometimes catches my interest, prompting a special purchase. My other go-to favorites include the Black Fig bar, which has bits of California Black Mission Figs, and the Dark Chocolate Coated Almonds. My current personal collection of Dick Taylor chocolates bars. Expanding My Chocolate Use It’s been about 10 years since I started buying Dick Taylor bean-to-bar craft chocolates. Recently, I began exploring both the Nibs and the Baking Chocolate. I find the Nibs are fantastic for my acai and granola bowls (if I liked yogurt, they’d be great in that too). My interest in using the baking chocolate was driven by a desire to make better chocolate chip cookies—like the rich, tasty ones from bakeries or restaurants. In another post, I’ll share how I upgraded my flour to complement the new baking chips. My first unboxing video! Visiting a Cacao Farm Recently, I had the opportunity to visit a cacao farm. It was a vacation I’ll never forget! I watched as the guide broke open a cacao pod, allowing us to eat the fruit and then the bean. The tour deepened my understanding of the care and passion these small farmers and craft chocolate makers invest in creating the amazing products we enjoy. Me visiting a Cacao farm in Kauai, Hawaii. The picture is the Cacao pod before as in a full-grown state. Frequently Asked Questions Does Dick Taylor Chocolate manually print their individual chocolate bar packaging? Yes, based on the woodworking and craftmanship backgrounds of the founders, Adam Dick and Dustin Taylor, they print each bar package on a vintage letterpress machine. What is your favorite Dick Taylor Chocolate? The 72% Belize, Toledo bar is by far my favorite due to the fruity notes that are present when I smell and taste the bar. I also alternate with a variety of others, including the 72% Madagascar, Sambirano and the 65% Tanzania, Kilombero What recipes do you make with Dick Taylor Chocolates? I currently make chocolate chip cookies with their 68% Tanzania Baking Chocolate Chips and use the Single Origin Roasted Cocoa Nibs in granola, sprinkled on a banana, and in my Acai bowls. Start Your Own Chocolate Sensory Experience If you’re curious to start your own chocolate sensory experience, I’ve listed my favorite bars below. Give one a try and let me know your thoughts in the comments! For Transparency: Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. If you purchase through them, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. I only recommend products I truly love and use myself. Enjoy!